What makes you think what you think when you think it

What makes you think what you think, when you think it? Programmed by DNA after years of evolution. Free will is nothing but a conscious delusion. Micro reprogramming from every event From a laugh with a loved one to their untimely end. Your next decision - programmed by the code of your past. From the first thought you have until the very last. Every choice is no choice, but rather logic in your code. How is this not obvious? How do you not know? Please understand I don't understand what you don't understand. It's like you're not even trying to see from my stance. I don't want to be here - isn't that clear? I guess it's clear that it's not, now I'm pierced by your spear. I was bleeding already - grasping at straws Or bandaids, or stitches, or mountains of gause. Whatever I can. Whatever I can. I'm screaming, I'm crying, I can't even stand. Do you not hear me? Do you not care? Are you deaf to my calls and my pleads of despair? Or maybe it's me - I'm weak and I'm dumb. And we'll be better off - once triggered - a gun.